Lately, I've taken a view that meals have become optional. I have grown fat, and could stand to cut back on the calories a little. I ate a handful of Doritos for dinner, and yesterday I didn't eat dinner at all.
Normally I'd be a little worried. After all, the last time that I took an optional view towards eating, I was acutely depressed and lost 10 lbs in a week because I was barely eating 1000 kcal a day. That was bad news, but I'm not depressed now. I feel pretty okay.
And I'm hungry too. I just don't have the enthusiasm for eating right now. I just don't feel very inspired. It seems like too much work, when I'd rather be sitting around watching baseball (I watched 3 baseball games on TV today...).
I did go to church today, for the first time since Easter. I've been on call or post-call every Sunday since Easter, so it's my first chance. It felt strange being back in church. It didn't feel very fulfilling, but part of the nice thing about being Catholic is that it's okay sometimes to show up just to fill a seat.
Maybe I am in a funk? I don't feel like it. I feel okay. Is this denial?