There's something funny about crushes, because they're completely nonsensical, but sometimes, something will pop up or remind you, and it's like nothing ever changed. I was thinking about one of my old crushes today as I flipped through my old letters and cards. And all I could think was what a tragedy.
I don't often toot my own horn (that sounds dirty...) but I think we would've been good together. We got along like peaches and cream. We were both so full of foibles and quirks and sharp edges to cut yourself on. We were both so flawed, but flawed like puzzle pieces. It's like, if you have two round spheres, they can never get that close. Only a little bit of their surfaces can ever really touch. But two puzzle pieces, with their odd sides and rough bits, they can interlock. We were like two funny shaped puzzle pieces, trying to find the places where we fit.
But we never locked together. We were like bookends, always being kept apart by one thing or another, and then when we got too close, one of us would put more stuff in between. And only looking back now do I see that we would've been a good fit, but it's a little late now. It's a little late to be digging up the past and trying to relive it. It's a little late to feel bad about it. I have far more immediate things that I can feel bad about.