People make very astute observations about me, and sometimes, these things are nice to know, just for my own benefit. For example, one friend pointed out my tendency to correct myself with the phrase, "Wait, that's a lie." Another friend pointed out that I seem to have a rule for everything, and I do. Last weekend, someone pointed out that all my similes and metaphors are food-related.

The food thing, that's a little disturbing really, but the rules, that's something I've known about. I do have rules for everything, because it's how I deal with the world. To be fair, (1) they're not my rules but rules of etiquette or morality or behavior, etc that I adhere to, and (2) I don't enforce these rules on anyone but myself.

I can't help the rules. It's how I've learned to deal with a world that makes no sense. I make sense of it. I exert my personal guidelines upon myself, and let that serve as an example. And there's a lot of silly stuff that I do that I know no one will follow, but it's me.

I'm a virgin, and I don't believe in pre-marital sex, not for me at least. I don't think sex is something people take seriously. People should. I've yet to convince anyone to engage in abstinence, but it's not like I'm handing out pamphlets.

I say please and thank you for everything. It's such a common courtesy, but I am not a dictator. It is not my place to order people around without some respect. Along those lines, anytime anyone helps me with something, I personally thank them. I thank most every nurse taking care of my patients in the hospital. I thank the operator for connecting me. I thank my attendings for their help. I believe that when you ask for someone's help, you should acknowledge their effort.

I never raise my voice in anger. It's not for me to put my emotions onto other people. I try to keep a calm and steady voice. Anger is often misdirected, and thus, I have come to try to contain my anger till I can vent it in a controlled and benign manner.

I always address people properly, or as they would want to be addressed. Self-identification is a crucial element to how we perceive ourselves. I am a different person when I am Doctor IF as opposed to Mister IF.

Part and parcel to that, I try to learn everyone's name. Calling someone by name is a powerful thing. It shows that you value him as a person. It has to be one of the most influential actions you can do on a daily basis.

I've got tons more of stuff like this, everything from how to eat correctly to how to hold an umbrella. And I'm sure you think I'm nuts, and maybe I am. I'm guessing that 99% of this stuff goes entirely unnoticed, but I'm happy if 1% is managing to get through. And if you don't believe that such minor actions can have any meaningful effect, then I have a proposal:

Next week, every person you interact with, find out their name, call them by name every time you see them, and personally (that's face to face) thank them for helping you with whatever needed to be done.

And it's any wonder why nurses love me.


Anonymous said...

You are the worst kind of person to deal with.

You are the ultimate snob that sees not the folly of your idealistic nature: life isn't fair.

One day this will smack you square in your cheek and you will drop to your knees and cry out loud:


Unfortunately you will not understand why in your greatest time of need, noone comes to your rescue!

That is what Fate teaches people like you.

incidental findings said...

I publish this only as an example of the type of completely bizarre and asinine comments that I sometimes receive.

To whomever posted this comment, thank you. You have moved me one step closer to removing anonymous comments.