I just can't say what I want to say, I can't find the right words. I feel so mixed in my life. I can palpably feel the emptiness of my existence, and it hurts. I don't know if this is a fair complaint, but when there's no one else to buffer the bad times, it's hard to recover from the downs, and there's no one to share the ups.
It's hard to grasp the dilemmas of my life. I'm without a rudder.