Just wanna be loved

This American Life has once again hit a hot button for me, talking about reactive attachment disorder, which is one of the child psych diagnoses that strikes the most horror in me.

The thing that turned me away from child psych is that it is so absolutely horrible. These kids are absolutely destroyed by forces entirely out of their control. I couldn't deal with child psych because for the most part, the pathology wasn't in the children; it was in the parents. Kids aren't born with reactive attachment disorder. It exists because there are awful people and situations out there, and it is actually possible for a child to grow up without love. The consequences are terrifying.

But one commenter wrote about her own work with foster children, and after listening to the radio program, I got a little hope. Maybe these kids do have a chance. But it takes so much dedication, so much work. And it's hard and scary. I'd like to think I could do it, but I couldn't. My basic pathology is that I desperately want to be loved, not the other way around.